Wednesday, June 27, 2012

Burpees were made in HELL!!

Today has been a GREAT DAY! Yes I know it's only 10 AM!! I've worked out...KILLED IT, I might add! I've eaten healthy (Greek yogurt and an apple) and now I'm back on my daily work grind!

So, todays challenge was 50 Burpees in 1 minute or less! Now, listen you workout not tell me I should have been able to complete more....MY challenge was 50 and I'm sticking to it for now! I started in the correct position...arms up, ready to jump....but, my feet wouldnt' leave the freakin' ground! Try again! ARMS UP....ready to jump, but all I could think of was how completely and utterly ridiculous I was gonna look! It's one thing to do this in boot camp, when EVERYBODY looks stupid...but the gym? I will not mention the cutie that (in my mind anyway) was staring at me! LOL! Anyway, I got past it and did the jump! Straight in the air and down to the ground...but my feet wouldn't kick out like I wanted. So up again and down again...this time I closed my eyes and KICKED OUT HARD! Whew! I was so excited, I forgot I had to come back up...don't forget the cutie is staring!! Now, here is the really hard part, bringing your feet back in and rising from that position without looking like a fool! Ok, feet in and....up! NOT! Feet came in, but up didn't happen! I had to re-position my feet to the sides so I could get up! LOLOLOL! I don't care anymore...I am DETERMINED to get this done! I huffed and I puffed and right around 28...I felt I could do NO MORE! But, I PRESSED and completed them! They were not pretty at all (can somebody show me a PRETTY burpee? I mean even the name is UGLY!!) but, I made it through!! When I got to 49, I felt this HUGE GRIN on the inside that showed up on the outside just after 50! WHEW!

I'm proud of the challenges I've faced and overcome....I know there are more to come, but nonetheless (I love using words like this!) I much more ready to face them today than last year or even yesterday!  I've discovered that I just feel good when I don't give up! I just feel warm, giggly and just plain happy when I face the challenge and complete it! No matter how small!

The rest of the workout was easy and simple compared to that! I am learning to step up my game if I want the results.  It ain't easy....but I am DETERMINED! That is really what this journey is all about...DETERMINATION and OVERCOMING!! I am FOCUSED FOR LIFE...not just a season!

HAVE A GOOD ONE AND BE FANTABULOUS TODAY AND EVERYDAY!  Push yourself and you will love it!

Friday, June 22, 2012

Good morning good people! Ok...confession time ONCE AGAIN! Geesh, I'm confessing so much this week...I keep looking around for a priest! Ha! goes: I GAINED 7 POUNDS!! Wait...I think I told you all that one! Here's another: I've only worked out twice this week! UGH! Oh, the SHAME, oh the HORROR! Whatever...I'm over it and on my way to the pool! I've come to realize that on this journey there will be days I just don't feel like doing right! Just don't feel like eating right! But what I will NOT do is STAY IN THOSE FEELINGS! I will get up and MOVE (even if only to vacuum these stairs - anybody else hate doing that?) And I will not dwell on my failures...but I choose instead to focus on the future! Stay focused and encouraged good people! WE ARE ON THIS FANTABULOUS JOURNEY TOGETHER!!! Now, where is my towel? #operationsexyonceagainisBAAAACK!

Friday, June 15, 2012

There are those who say they have been struggling with weight their whole a kid, teen and young adult. I can't really say the same see it wasn't a struggle for me. I was fat, cute and didn't really care what others thought! So I just kept living, as the old folks advised, and never really gave MUCH thought to losing weight. I had convinced myslef that all 5'4.5" (yes the half means something - SHUTUP!) of me was just - - thick, big boned, healthy, etc. I mean, I tried occassional fad diets (remember the cabbage soup diet - YUCK! and the Lemonade one - uhh, yeah, someone should have told me don't ADD SUGAR!) and I would walk about a block before feeling like I was gonna DIE ANY SECOND! I can't even begin to tell you the number of gyms I joined and went HARD for about one week before finding some reason to quit! But, none of it ever lasted. The effort wasn't there. I really truly just didn't care. It didn't help that medically I was healthy...all my numbers were either normal or below normal and I felt fine. It also didn't help that socially I had never had the whole "can't find a man" thing....uhh, until now! LOL! I dated, got married, divorced and dated some what was the problem really?
Earlier this year and I saw the below pictures...I was absolutely horrified! I mean...really? Who lets themselves get this big and can still look in the mirror and say I LOVE YOU! You can't! And those of you that know me...know I LOVE ME SUM ME!!! As much as I thought I was in control...I wasn't - CLEARLY! Food had become my boss, my teacher, my comforter, my everything....I was losing control over my life to the power of food! Once the realization of that hit me....I became afraid. Yep, really scared! I thought, if I don't regain control over this area of my life...I'm going to die! I needed to figure this thing out quickly before it was too late! So I prayed and took a good long hard honest look at who I was. If you ever want to change your life for the better....ask God to show you who you REALLY are. It's not always pretty and can be painful, but it is necessary for change! I was hiding from some very painful facts of my life.
However, as a Life Coach and Christian counselor, I realized I was asking and telling others to be transparent with me...yet, not willing to be transparent with myself! I was a HOT MESS! I had done what I counseled others against...using anything (food, drugs, sex and people) as a crutch or comforter for the pain I was feeling. Enough was enough! I had to face some very real demons from my past and let them know...YOU ARE NO LONGER WELCOME IN MY LIFE! I had to forgive some people...mainly myself....and let some old hurts go. What a freeing experience! What a feeling of deliverance! Whew!
Finally, I had to have a MADE UP MIND and that is where I am today! I am determined to get this weight off me....and get healthy for good! I am determined to not only continue to change my really was the one thing that was keeping me unhealthy...but, I am determined to CHANGE MY LIFE! I am making HEALTHY and WISE choices about food and exercise so that I may continue to live this life as it was meant to be lived....FANTABULOUSLY!
So, this note is not only about being's about accountability! A good friend of mine told me recently...YOUR BODY WILL DO WHAT YOU FORCE IT TO DO! So, failing is not an option...neither is giving up or quitting! This is my life now....and I'm LOVING IT! What do you want for your life right now? GO GET IT! CHANGE YOUR THINKING AND CHANGE YOUR VERY LIFE!
The journey by far isn't over....I've lost 72 pounds and have another 50 or so to go....but, I'm looking forward to my continued success!

Thursday, April 8, 2010

The Struggle of Forgiveness

Ok, I have been away for some time AND I am veering away from my usual topic of weight loss...I'll be back with that, but I wanted to discuss something else..something that can hinder weight loss...something that can hinder FANTABULOUS LIVING!!!

Today, I struggle. I struggle with the TRUE meaning of written by our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ! He said:

You have heard that it was said, "Love your neighbor and hate your enemy."
But I tell you: Love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you (Matthew 5:43-44).


But I tell you who hear me: Love your enemies, do good to those who hate you, bless those who curse you, pray for those who mistreat you (Luke 6:27-28).

Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse (Romans 12:14).


Do not repay anyone evil for evil. Be careful to do what is right in the eyes of everybody. If it is possible, as far as it depends on you, live at peace with everyone. Do not take revenge, my friends, but leave room for God's wrath, for it is written: "It is mine to avenge; I will repay," says the Lord. On the contrary: "If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him something to drink. In doing this, you will heap burning coals on his head." Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good (Romans 12:17-21).


Do not repay evil with evil or insult with insult, but with blessing, because to this you were called so that you may inherit a blessing (1 Peter 3:9).

REALLY God? I'm with the level of forgiveness, where I don't repay evil for evil...I'm even OK with lettin' some stuff go and moving on....but, you want me to PRAY for my enemy? Ask YOU to BLESS them? Is this a test? YES IT IS! Well, so far....I'm failing!!!

It's so easy to forgive at that first know, someone did you wrong and you just move on. Or somebody wrongfully accused you of something and it caused pain...and you just move on. But, God says for us to PRAY EARNESTLY THAT HE BLESS YOUR ENEMIES! What? I don't know about that one...I'm working on it, though. I mean, I don't wish ill against ANYONE...but, do I really want God to Bless I really want them to be in good health, prosperous and have the abundance of God's Blessings? Yeah...ok.

It is so easy to pray for our family and loved know, your Mom, Dad, child, sister, brother, BFF's, extended family! In this world of technology, it's even easy to pray for all of my FB friends and trust I don't know half of them! LOL! But, I pray for them...because they are my "family". I can even say it's easy to pray God's blessing on an UNKNOWN enemy...Iraq, serial killers whose actions haven't affected us directly, 9/11 perpetrators, etc...we don't know them personally, but they are enemies of our country and fellow man. So, we pray for them to be delivered from evil and that God protect even them. All of that is fairly easy to do and we do it without pause.

But, what about the KNOWN enemy?

What about....that woman who slept with, fell in love with and eventually caused the divorce between you and YOUR HUSBAND?

What about the abusive husband? Who had you in the hospital so many times? Or your child?

What about the ex who not only won't pay child support, but doesn't even ACKNOWLEDGE his/her child?

What about the ex who keeps breaking promises to you and your child...causing continual pain?

What about the parent that left...never to return? Or did return with a new family?

What about that man/woman who molested you as a child? Or molested YOUR CHILD?

What about the person who started the fire that killed your family member?

What about that person that spread malicious gossip about you?

What about that "friend" who got you in trouble with the law and YOU went to jail and they did not?

What about the business/company that fired you UNJUSTLY or truly discriminated against you?

What about that person who lied on you so bad that you lost your job, your home, your car...Your life?

Can you pray for the person that caused your life to be altered in such a way it will NEVER be the same?

Can you be in the same room with any of these people and LOVE THEM UNCONDITIONALLY? Weep with them, pray for them, laugh with them? That's TRUE FORGIVENESS.....

Like I said...I struggle with this....I am seeking God's help in breaking through this barrier or this struggle...I am trying to follow Stephen's example in Acts 7:60 AFTER THEY STONED HIM FOR NOTHING MORE THAN SPREADING THE GOSPEL - Then he fell on his knees and cried out, "Lord, do not hold this sin against them." When he had said this, he fell asleep. (Translation - HE DIED!!)

Yes, we want the Blessings of the Lord to rain down on us...but the reality is they rain down on the JUST (us) and the UNJUST (our enemies)...and God wants us to WANT this for them just as much as we want this for ourselves.

I'm praying my struggle will be over soon....The abundance of GRACE and MERCY that the Lord has shown me....I want to show it to EVERYONE...because I want so badly to be just like HIM! THAT'S PLATINUM LIVING!!!


Thursday, October 8, 2009

Just because they make it in your size....

For those of you in this weight loss struggle with me...there are a few things we already know and a few things we have yet to discover.

When I started this thing I had NO idea how I would feel once I lost the first 10 lbs! AMAZING! It never dawns on you that you still have a ways to go, but that first 10 pounds feels so so very good! I can always tell when a woman has lost even a few pounds. It's written all over her face and you can see it in her body language. There is a new found confidence in her walk and she may even begin wearing her makeup more, she also may start to think she can wear certain clothes and this is where we have problems.


This can be very disastrous as well as tragic if you are not careful! Ok, so I have lost the first 10 pounds and I'm feeling very good about good that my confidence, which is normally very high anyway, is now SOARING! I go to the store and while I realize that I am still in the "big girl" sizes...I am down one size. I go to the rack and very smugly pick up a pair of pants in a smaller size. Now, those who know me, know that I don't like to try clothes on in the store...I am much more comfortable trying it on at home....just before I plan to wear it!

The outfit is cute I tell you....nice pants made of lycra and spandex (yes i said it) and a very cute, snug fitting top that is all the rage in the know the ones with the size 0 models! Yes, it is the latest summer issues of Vogue, Glamour and Cosmo that I with my new found weight loss am getting my fashion tips!

My friends and I are planning on going out this evening and I want to show off my whopping 10 pound loss. Thinking everyone will notice and compliment me I am very excited about getting dressed and going out! Woohoo! I am too cute now!

I get dressed and apply my best makeup and glance - yes I said GLANCE - at myself in the mirror. My gut was telling me "I am pouring out of this shirt" and my BUTT was telling me "I look lumpy in these pants"...but I ignored them and went on my way.

Now there is something to say about your bathroom mirror versus the windows at the restaurant....the bathrooms tends to tell you that you look MARVELOUS!! But the window shows you just how you really look!

I'm walking in and I look at the window and there is this unbelievably FAT chick walking beside me and she looks awful! Her gut is hanging over her pants and her pants are way too tight...showing ALL of her lumps and could she go out of the house like that I wonder? Upon closer inspection, I realize this out of shape girl is ME!!!!

I am mortified and the look on my friends faces tells me they are too! My very dear friend comes up to me and quietly whispers these words...."Baby, not yet!" Needless to say we made a quick detour to my house so I could change into something more WEIGHT appropriate!

Bottom line - Spandex and Lycra should not be worn above a size 10! Again ladies...just take a friend shopping with you as you continue to lose weight and remember...JUST BECAUSE THE MAKE IT IN YOUR SIZE - DOES NOT MEAN YOU NEED TO WEAR IT!

Much success to you all!

Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Body Magic or is it a Miracle?

Everybody now knows I am on this QUEST to lose weight, right? Right! It is a battle of the bulge and most days I feel like I am losing the freakin' WAR!!! I mean, I'm working out, eating right and staying the course...but most days it seems to be an insurmountable task!! But not I am on top of the world! I feel like the QUEEN OF SHEBA and all the world is my domain! Why all the bliss? Did I actually lose at least a pound? Quite the a matter of fact, I actually gained 1.2 pounds, but that's another story for another day!!!

I am ecstatic because of this little garment I tried on and fell in love with! It is the BODY MAGIC by ARDYSS!!! Do not be fooled by impostors, imitators, frauds and pseudo garments...they are NOT all me, I've tried my fair share! I am so in love with this, I wanted to sleep in it last night, but there's also another reason for that....later.

Now, I know I am going on and on about this thing...and you are probably wondering why all the fuss? If you have never attempted to put one of these things are in for a treat!

A friend of mine told me about this Network Marketing meeting that she wanted me to attend with her. At first I told her absolutely NOT! I hate those things! People all excited about the money SOMEBODY ELSE made, or passing around checks that look suspiciously like a copy of a Quicken check you make yourself on your PC, telling you "you too can be at the Diamond level after only one or two months!!" And most of the products or services are so expensive...nobody I know will buy it, much less join you in duping the rest of the world! PLEASE!! I hate it I tell you...hate it. But, I went anyway, just to support her....ok ok ok, that's a lie...I went because she told me I could model this garment and she PROMISED I would drop 2 sizes INSTANTLY!!!

INSTANTLY???!! Now, people have different ideas about this word. TO ME Instantly means - right this very minute...before I have a chance to blink the change is gon' come! Well, if this was the case, then this was something I had to see. So, I met her at the hotel and signed in. I noticed they took my email, phone number and address....great, I thought, I'll be bombarded with MLM information for the next 10 years! Anyway, I went in and waited for this presentation to start. There were about 10 other people there all waiting as I was so I asked the lady next to me if she knew what this was about. Big mistake! She was A PLANT!!! I'm convinced of it! She proceeded to tell me all about this magical garment that she was wearing and all it had done for her. I was NOT impressed! As she talked I said to myself...they are gonna have to do better than this dizzy broad to reel me in. I am solid on this...I will not join ANOTHER MLM! I don't care what the product is! I just won't do it!

Finally, she stopped talking as the presenters came in..."here we go" I whispered to myself, "time for the show!" They talked for about 10 minutes about the Body Magic and all it had done for them and the people they knew and a few more minutes about the other products the company had to offer and finally they brought out what was expected. The "pitch"! Yada, yada, yada...yeah, yeah, yeah. I tuned them out during this part, because I WILL NOT JOIN ANOTHER MLM! I don't care what the product is! I just won't do it!

The presenter finished and then said they wanted all the models to go upstairs and try on the garment, but first to come up and show everyone the "before" look. I got up and paraded my fat behind in front of all these strangers, but I didn't care. I wanted to see if I truly would drop 2 dress sizes...INSTANTLY! And if so, I wanted them to really take a good look at me now!

There were only three of us taken upstairs and ushered into another room. One girl was a size 6 so I couldn't figure out why she was there....another girl said she was a 14, but she looked like she could have easily been a size 18 or bigger! Nevertheless, we were instructed to strip down to our undies (yes, I was clean and matching!). I was measured and handed a garment and told to turn it inside out and pull it up from the thighs...ok, this! NOT! "I think you gave me the wrong size!" I was out of breath and it wasn't even up over my thighs! "No, keep pulling!"

Finally, I got it up over my thighs and for the tummy (ok, GUT!)... GRUNT...GROAN ..GRUNT...GROAN...SWEAT....CRY! WTH?! Are you serious? THIS IS THE WRONG SIZE PEOPLE!! Can't you see I am dying over here? "No, keep pulling!" I'm about to take this thing off and throw it out the freakin' window!

One of the ladies came over and helped me get it completely on, but now it needed to be hooked. Let me describe it at this point: It's a one piece garment with suspenders (see video above), but it has about TEN THOUSAND hooks in the, just who is going to get me into and out of this thing everyday? "It will be easier after this first will mold to your body and you will be putting it on faster everyday!" Yeah, ok....if you say so!

The lady says to me, "Ok, now lay down on the bed and let me hook you up." Easy enough. "This should be easy" she says, as she pokes my stomach. "Your pliable and soft!" Now I know that was meant to be a compliment, but I felt like a dang sofa on display! I laid down and she proceeded to start hooking the garment. Now I'm looking down and seeing all of my FAT bulging through this thing and saying to myself..."she'll never be able to do this". She was determined and as she pulled and grabbed and stuffed me into this thing, SHE began to SWEAT!

Now I was feeling bad, but there was nothing I could do about it. She pulled, and I gathered...I was sucking in my breath and she was grunting like a pig!! Just as I was about to give up...the other lady came over and said, "here, let me help!" Now, I am just laying there trying not to cry out in pain because lady #1 has her knee in my side and lady #2 has her elbow in my throat...but they are determined to get me in this thing if it KILLED ONE OF US!

I looked up and both of the other ladies are completely dressed and ready to go back downstairs and model for the I sit, no here I lay, like a stuffed pig getting ready for the slaughter and no closer to being "hooked up" than I was 15 minutes ago!!

WE managed to stuff me into the garment and then she said..."Ok, now get up." What? I thought you guys could just put my clothes on and let the people come up here, 'cause there is NO WAY I can get up! WRONG! Not only did I get up, but once I put my clothes back on, I actually felt pretty good. Then I looked in the mirror....I was astounded! Shocked! Mystified! I looked GREAT!

For those of you that know know I am a pretty confident full figured woman. But, now? Girl, please....tell LL COOL J, I'm ready!!! Somehow, this garment gave me that X factor that we all waist was actually visible, and my boobs? Well lets just say, I could have served after dinner drinks and not spilled a drop! To top it all off; I felt pretty darn good! Once I was done admiring myself, we all went back downstairs to the conference room. We walked in and paraded our stuff in front of those strangers and I did the NAOMI CAMPBELL WALK! I was FIERCE!

I felt so good, I wanted to wear this garment for days upon days! Nights upon nights...I couldn't imagine taking it off! So I didn't! I purchased not only the one I had on, but I did the unthinkable...I joined the MLM business side! I promise you it was well worth the $300. As a matter of fact of the four that I get for joining I sold two of them at retail and made 100% of my money it was FREE!

I can't tell it all have to see it yourself.

Saturday, September 19, 2009

Brownies vs Carrots

As I sit here pondering life....I do that sometimes...just sit and ponder. I really should be at the gym or at the very least eating something healthy. But, here I sit...pondering and eating the rest of the cream cheese brownies.

Why, you may ask? Several reasons come to mind, none of which are really good excuses, but they are reasons so I stick with them. One: I have had them for about two weeks now and I am sick of eating a corner as a treat to myself...each corner is about 98 calories and it took me 8 days to eat two brownies this way. Two: and this is the most important reason....TODAY IS A FAT DAY!

I love FAT DAYS! These are the days where, it doesn't matter to me WHAT I eat or how much. These days don't count in my strive for FAT FREEDOM...these days are just days that I choose (hopefully, not back to back) to eat whatever I want and what I want is never healthy! So here I sit, pondering and eating, eating and plan is to finish the last two brownies and then drink a glass of milk to wash it all down.

That was the plan....well, my body had other plans! I forgot that once you begin to eat healthy and your body gets adjusted to's hard to go back and start eating junk in abundance! Can we say REJECTION?!?! In it's most ugly body said NO WAY! Get a carrot...and get one NOW!

So the good news is this...I am adjusting to this new way of eating for my health and not for the heck of it! The bad news is this: No more binge eating! Back to one fourth of one half of a brownie as a treat! If I am truthful...this SUCKS!

I listen to these emaciated people telling me to only eat what comes from the earth and eat in moderation! Well, I don't want to! I want to eat what comes from the frozen food section of the grocery store, I want to eat what comes from the bread and sweet aisle and I want to eat EVERYTHING at the checkout counter! Yes, I was the kid whose parent needed the line that had a sign over it saying "No Candy Line!"

Sigh, it's all good....all this work and no sweets has helped me to lose a whopping 42 pounds! So, I will not go back...I will chose healthy...I will continue on my quest!

Or die trying! Give me that carrot stick....but, could you pass the ranch dressing too?!?